A Call for Internet Legislation?

Here’s a really good example of technology being used for the worst:

http://media.www.pittnews.com/media/storage/
paper879/news/2007/02/26/Opinion/
Editorial.Local.Suit.Brings.Free.Speech.Debate-2741227.shtml

In one post I read, someone pointed out that the people reading these profiles should know that they’re not authentic. My point is that the technology is so good nowadays, would it occur to anyone to think twice? It’s a shame we have such a difficult time putting ourselves in other peoples shoes. We should think of information like feathers in a pillow - once it’s out in the open, you can never retrieve all of them. Free speech is a choice and all choices have consequences.

Strangely Familiar Fruit

Let’s get to the heart of the matter. Who are we? Who are Americans? When people from other countries talk about us, what do we want them to say? What are we teaching our children? I don’t mean what we say to them in front of others, I mean what do we whisper to them? What do we tell them when the doors are locked and the blinds are pulled? Children don’t come out of the womb knowing that tying a noose to a tree holds a memory so profound that it hurts the great-grand children of people long dead. They aren’t born with the awareness that some people should be allowed to sit under a tree while others are not.

We say we want peace, but how do we foster it? We can’t just say we want it and hope it miraculously happens. We have to put our good intentions into action. The next time you go shopping with your family and friends, resist the urge to judge others and say hello instead. It doesn’t matter if they don’t answer you. When your child questions you about people of other races, stop and think carefully about what you say. What would you want those same people to tell their children about you? Peace begins in the mind and heart of each individual and has to be practiced everyday. Peace has to be carefully taught.

You might think these suggestions are antiquated or old school. “That turn the other cheek stuff doesn’t work today.” you may say. What is the alternative? Anger only breeds more anger. A child who was taught sixteen years ago that the feelings of people who look different from him don’t matter is now acting out those lessons daily. That child is inflicting the pain he was taught and I guarantee you will pass them down to his own children like a family heirloom. The only way he can learn to accept and love others is to be accepted and loved.

I don’t expect to live in a world where we all hold hands and break into song like a Broadway musical, but we need to come up with effective strategies to genuinely engage and understand each other. It also wouldn’t hurt if everyone of all races read a slave narrative to better comprehend American history. If you don’t know anyone from a different race, find someone and get to know them. Have them over for dinner. Invite them to your children’s birthday parties or play dates. It’s hard. It’s scary, but would you rather throw a party now or put out a fire later?

I am deeply concerned about us. If we can’t sit under a tree together, how can we end a war?

The evils of gossip...

I would ask any one reading this who doesn't have direct experience to be open minded and gentle. While the situations that are being described to you may seem insane or improbable, it might help to think about various circumstances in history that involved large groups of people saying nothing as a tragedy occurs. It's also very important to discourage gossip where ever you go, no matter how tempting. We all know what it's like to be in a situation where one person starts to talk about or make fun of someone. This is not okay. Gossip hurts. Think how you would feel if it were you or someone you love.

Enough talk, it's time for action. We need to form support groups and get law enforcement involved. Any ideas?

Why have a site about this?

I've given this some thought. I mean, why should I or anybody put time or energy into something that's so negative? I could only come up with two reasons: the first is therapeutic; I feel that I'm being proactive because I refuse to be a victim. The second is that if this is happening to me, then it's happening to others and I want you to know that you're not alone. Let me repeat this: You are not alone. I'll do my best to find resources for mobbing/stalking for those of us that don't fall neatly into categories. My best hope is that this can become a forum for people to share and help each other. If anyone has suggestions, websites, blogs anything - it's greatly appreciated.

What is mobbing?

"Mobbing is an emotional assault. Through innuendo, rumors and public discrediting, a hostile environment is created in which one individual gathers to willingly or unwillingly participate in continuous malevolent actions to force a person out of a place."

- Mobbing Emotional Abuse in the American Workplace by Davenport, Schwartz and Elliott, 1999

The actual quote reads workplace not place, but the experiences I've had were not at work, but on the street, in supermarkets - things that we all do in a normal day. I've been followed, called names, had things thrown in my direction and the worst of it - had my reputation tarnished through lies and unwanted pictures taken of me and placed on the internet. I know if this has happened to me, it's happening to others.

When I was doing research on mobbing, most of the information was based in the UK and was workplace related. This saddens me because we all know bullying happens in the US, but no one really likes to talk about it. Anytime I see a story about it on television, they only show the target, never the bully. And the target always seems to come off as weak and uncool as if somehow what happened to them was their fault. It's time to change this way of thinking. Bullying is pathetic and weak and always will be.